Ali G tackles Pamela Anderson on beach

Can Britney say Ironic?

Is Clay Aiken gay?

Hunter S. Thompson

To anyone who loved this counterculture writer:

Just so you know. The Sixties are over. My college tried to tell me how great the Sixties were and what did I find out after having to be subjected to countless hours of liberal trash ... well, I found out that the decade sucked ass. If I need to explain why then you didn't live it or you haven't read about it.

For those of you who think your life is crap

Bar Translations

1. "YOU GET THIS ONE, NEXT ROUND IS ON ME."
(We won't be here long enough to get another round.)

2. "I'LL GET THIS ONE, NEXT ONE IS ON YOU."
(Happy hour is about to end...drafts are now a dollar, but by the next
round they'll be $4.50 a pop.)

3. "HEY, WHERE IS THAT FRIEND OF YOURS?"
(I have no interest in talking to you except as a way to get your
attractive friend into a compromising position.)

4. "CAN I GET A GLASS OF WHITE ZINFANDEL." (FEMALE)
(I'm easy.)

5. "CAN I GET A GLASS OF WHITE ZINFANDEL." (MALE)
(I'm gay.)

6. "EVER TRY A BODY SHOT?" (MALE TO FEMALE)
(I am even willing to drink tequila if it means that I get to lick you.)

7. "EVER TRY A BODY SHOT?" (FEMALE TO MALE)
(If this is how wild I am in the bar, imagine what I'll do to you on the
ride home?)

8. "I DON'T FEEL WELL, LET'S GO HOME." (FEMALE)
(You are paying more attention to your friends than me.)

9. I DON'T FEEL WELL, LET'S GO HOME." (MALE)
(I'm horny.)

10. "WHO'S GOT THE NEXT ROUND?"
(I haven't bought a round in almost 3 years, but I am an expert at
diverting attention.)

11. "EXCUSE ME." (MALE TO MALE)
(Get the hell out of the way.)

12. "EXCUSE ME." (MALE TO FEMALE)
(I am going to grope you now.)

13. "EXCUSE ME." (FEMALE TO MALE)
(Don't even think about groping me, just get the hell out of the way.)

14. "EXCUSE ME." (FEMALE TO FEMALE)
(Move your fat ass. Who do you think you are anyway? You are not all that
pretty, missy, and don't think for one minute that you are. Coming in here
dressing like a ho... Get your eyes off of my man, or I'll slap you,
bitch,like the slut you are.)

15. "WHAT DO YOU HAVE ON TAP?"
(What's cheap?)

16. "CAN I HAVE A WHITE RUSSIAN?" (MALE)
(I'm really gay.)

17. "CAN I HAVE A WHITE RUSSIAN?" (FEMALE)
(I'm really easy.)

18. "THAT PERSON LOOKS REALLY FAMILIAR."
(Did I sleep with him/her?)

19. CAN I JUST GET A GLASS OF WATER?" (FEMALE)
(I'm annoying, but cute enough to get away with this.)

20. I DON'T HAVE MY ID ON ME." (FEMALE)
(I'm 16 .)

21. "I DON'T HAVE MY ID ON ME." (MALE)
(I don't have a license since I got pulled over and blew a .2 after my
last visit here.)

FYI Ladies!!!

Give me a mulligan baby!

This goes out to my married golfing friends and the soon to be ones as well.

Parents Playing a Joke on their kids -- classic!

Who has legal authority now?

What is Gaza's legal status? I would like to know. The land is neither fully occupied nor completely sovereign. International law never imagined anything like this. There are two basic standards established for "occupied" territory. The first one, in the 1907 Hague Regulations, is effective military control by another power. The Fourth Geneva Convention (1949) also lays down what the occupier must do for the occupied, such as providing basic services (water, education, health), giving aid agencies free access, and --not settling its own citizens there.

This still leaves one to ponder the question of legal statust of Gaza today. I for one would take the evolving standard of facts side. To the extent that there are responsibilities by Israel not yet transferred to the Palestinian Authority, they have to be accountable for these. Just as the Palestinian side has to be accountable for the responsibilities it's received.

Uzbekistan

Do you know who this man is? Well, he is Islam Karimov, the President of Uzbekistan. He is responsible for police authorities opening fire on a peaceful demonstration of close to 10,000 people in the city of Andijan (killing 1,000). Think of this incident as Tiananmen Square like. Tanks rolled through the main square, firing indiscriminately, snipers picked off their victims from convenient buildings, and, later on, soldiers shot some of the wounded. That was three months ago.

So, what has the United States, the United Nations, or the European Union done? What have been the following sanctions placed on Uzbekistan? NOTHING!!!

During the cold war the West would sit back and turn a blind eye to the misdeeds of dictators, but this is something special. Never to my knowledge has so little been done by so many in the face of such atrocity. At least China was given a slap on the hand for a few years after Tiananmen. The actions of the Uzbekistan government is on the same scale as Tiananmen, but still noting has occurred.

The United States has said that it will ponder sanctions. In a statement on the Andijan killings, U.S. Ambassador Stephan M. Minkes stated, "The United States condemns the indiscriminate use of force against unarmed civilians and deeply regrets the substantial loss of life." Deeply regrets!!! Take some action. We overthrew a dictator in Iraq I was told for crap like this. Even with this so called strong statement the U.S. is waiting for Europe's lead. Again, not a widely noted feature of America's foreign policy these days.

There is, however, some sense behind this plan. As a former member of the Soviet Union, Uzbekistan is a part of the widest of Europe's concentric circles. It is a member of the European Bank for Reconstruction and Development, and it has a partnership and co-operation agreement (PCA) with the EU. So there is some justification in allowing Europe, with its well known human rights and security policy (ha!), to take the lead. In taken the lead, the European Union has risen to the occasion as grandly as it did over Bosnia, Iraq, and on so many other occasions: with a display of SPINELESSNESS worthy of a sea full of jellyfish@!

First, in June, it demanded that Uzbekistan submit to an international investigation to determine precisely what happened in Andijan. Failure to comply by July 1st, itterrigyingly threatened, might lead to a "partial suspension" of the PCA. Some countires wanted to go so far as to threaten a visa ban for (some) Uzebk officials and possibly even an arms embargo-- but that was reckoned to be a bit too tough.

So, what has happened since then? Well, July 1st came and went, as did August 1st. Still the EU has done nothing. You might ask hasn't the West ignored equally grisly abuses in Chechnya? Yes, but there it can at least be arqued that friendship with Russia is in its vital interest. Friendship with Uzbekistan is not. The country does have gas, but its not very accessible. The failure to punish Mr. Karimov discredits the United States and the West. This type of violence has gone on for far too long.

Oil

I want to point out to all those who will bitch about the high price of oil that although gas pricres have hit $3 a gallon in some cities, in Britain or Germany motorists pay around $6 a gallon. The United States uses roughly 50% more oil per dollar of GDP than the European Union, largely because consumers pay less.

What is the best long-term solution--higher gas taxes in the United States. Yet, we prefer fuel-economy regulations to higher gas taxes. I am thinking the regulations have not worked since oil efficiency in the United States is at a 20-year low. The longer the United States puts off the oil problem, the worse the answer will be for all Americans.

Quote of the day

"The politicians don't just want your money. They want your soul. They want you to be worn down by taxes until you are dependent and helpless. When you subsidize poverty and failure, you get more of both." -- James Dale Davidson

Cool Pictures

I will never wax!!!

I thank G-d everyday that I am not a women for so many reasons. Waxing is one of them. I think of myself as a guys-guy, but I hate even looking at that picture of Steve Carell getting his chest hair waxed. Ugh!!! And women do that down south?!? I am not even getting into giving birth. To all the women I know and those that I have not had the pleasure to meet I say bravo ... bravo ladies for putting up with all this pain.

Log Cabin Republicans

As a self profess libertarian I gladly support any organization that is for limited government and personal responsibility. That is why I would like to highlight the Log Cabin Republicans. I truly wish they were in the main stream of the Republican party, but President Bush isn't knocking on my door to take my advice. The Christian Right will turn the Republican party into the party of big government if we don't look out. And where will that get us? Well, we will have two parties that think the federal government can do everything! Then I'll have to move to ... grrr ... Mexico? Ha! Anyhow, here is the goals of the Log Cabin Republicans and I must say they should be made part of the Republican platform:

"We are loyal Republicans. We believe in low taxes, limited government, strong defense, free markets, personal responsibility, and individual liberty. Log Cabin represents an important part of the American family-taxpaying, hard working people who proudly believe in this nation's greatness. We also believe all Americans have the right to liberty, freedom, and equality. Log Cabin stands up against those who preach hatred and intolerance. We stand up for the idea that all Americans deserve to be treated equal-regardless of their sexual orientation."

Air America

I have not posted on Air America, the liberal radio station based in New York city, because whats the point really to talk about a nonstarter? Yet, now I have reason to enlighten my readers to a real scandal at Air America.

I will start first with the Boys and Girls Clubs of America, which is considering a formal staff recommendation that would expell its Bronx, New York, affiliate, the Gloria Wise Boys and Girls Club, for apparent involvement in -- and concealment of -- a scheme by which nearly $900,000 was improperly diverted to Air America bank accounts intended to fund social service programs for disadvantaged children and the elderly.

I guess liberals need the money more than disadvantaged children and the elderly. Maybe their thinking is that the federal government will just hand out some more money for social programs to replace the "lost" funds. Why this would be a public service! We the American public could indirectly fund a liberal radio network, but we already do that with NPR.

Cindy Sheehan

I understand too well living in Washington, DC the politics of bereavement. Back in 2002, the Democratic party used the death of Paul Wellstone as a political tool. They called on Republicans to not campaign until after the planned public memorial for Wellstone. However, the day of reverence turned into a poltical rally. Many people walked out and others complained. The election in Minnesota changed overnight and Norm Coleman would go on to defeat Walter F. Mondale.

Turning to a new form of bereavement we have Cindy Sheehan, who is protesting the war in Iraq by camping outside the President's home in Crawford, Texas. She is a mother of a fallen son in Iraq. She is also a liberal political activist with the backing of the most extreme groups on the left (two groups are MoveOn.org and Crawford Peace House, which is dedicated less to the opposition to the war in Iraq than to the belief that Isreal is the source of all evil).

Unlike others who have taken the death of a loved one and used it as a political tool, Sheehan's partisan fight has been revealed rather quickly. Many have began to question her, including family members, also bereaved, that denounced her performance, and other military families have come forward to declare she does not speak for them. Among them has been linda Ryan, whose son, Marine Corporal Marc T. Ryan, was killed in Iraq. "George Bush didn't kill [Cindy Sheehan's] son," she told the Gloucester County Times. "George Bush was my son's commander in chief. My son, Marc, totally believed in what he was doing. She's going about this not realizing how many people she's hurting. When she refers to anyone killed in Iraq, she's referring to my son. She doesn't have anything to say about what happened to my son."

The moral authority of parents who bury children killed in Iraq is NOT absolute. Cindy Sheehan is only one of thousands of parents that have lost children all over the world. Does her voice rule over all others? Do we accept the moral authority of a pro-Bush mother of a dead Marine?

The problem is that there are so many people who have buried children, and so many more who have had children wounded, and so many more who have children in danger, that their poltical views cannot be uniform. What happens when the opinions behind which they put all of their moral authority collide? When parents and other family members of the dead and wounded disagree about politics, who gets custody of the moral authority? Is the moral authority of Cindy Sheehan compromised by the dissent of her husband, who is also a parent in agony?

Do not get me wrong, I am not trying to attack Sheehan to be mean. My point is to say to all those who take advantage of a death: You must cut this out! We are tired of having our emotions worked on and worked over; tired of the matched sets of dueling relatives, tired of all of these claims on our sympathy, that at the same time defy common sense. The heart breaks for everyone who lost relatives and friends on September 11, as it does for the relatives of the war dead and wounded, as it does for the family of Paul Wallstone. It does not break for MoveOn.org or Crawford Peace House, who have not been heartbroke, except by a string of election reverses, and are using the anguish of other poeple in an effort to turn them around.

Quote of the day

"The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary." -- H. L. Mencken

Restaurant No-Nos

Blah! And I thought restaurants only did this type of stuff to me. I tend to get bills that read: "Tall sexy guy" on them.

Quote of the day

"All that Communism needs to make it successful is someone to feed and clothe it." Columbia Record

Important Information!!!

Good old French. Always trying to improve.

I must of missed this in the newspaper

Help me up!!!

Quote of the day

"Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state, an intolerable one." -- Thomas Paine

For All of Our Brave Men and Women -- Thank You

I wish I was a better writer and could convey the sense of pride I feel everyday for being born in such a wonderful country. There are so many people that make the United States a great place to live, but I want to just bring your attention to one individual who should be honored -- Brian Chontosh.

He is a Marine that has served with great distintion in Iraq. Although not the only individual that should be called a hero, Brian is the best that the United States has to offer and I can only hope to do justice to his and other's brave men and women now serving this country. I give you now an account of Brian Chontosh's heroic actions written by Bob Lonsberry on June 2005:

Those of you who might not know, the man on the left is the Commandant of the Marine Corps, and he is proud to know the man on the right. Maybe you'd like to hear about a real American, somebody who honored the uniform he wears.

Meet Brian Chontosh. Churchville-Chili Central School. Class of 1991. Husband and about-to-be father. First lieutenant (now Captain) in the United States Marine Corps. And a genuine hero, the secretary of the Navy said so.

At 29 Palms in California Brian Chontosh was presented with the Navy Cross, the second highest award for combat bravery the United States can bestow. That's a big deal. But you won't see it on the network news tonight. And all you'll read in Brian's hometown newspaper is two paragraphs of nothing.

The odd fact about the American media in this war is that it's not covering the American military. The most plugged-in nation in the world is receiving virtually no true information about what its warriors are doing. Oh, sure, there's a body count. We know how many Americans have fallen. And we see those same casket pictures day in and day out. And we're almost on a first-name basis with the jerks who abused the Iraqi prisoners. And we know all about improvised explosive devices and how we lost Fallujah and what Arab public-opinion polls say about us and how the world hates us. We get a non-stop feed of gloom and doom.
But we don't hear about the heroes. The incredibly brave GIs who honorably do their duty. The ones our grandparents would have carried on their shoulders down Fifth Avenue. The ones we completely ignore, like Brian Chontosh.

It was a year ago on the march into Baghdad. Brian Chontosh was a platoon leader rolling up Highway 1 in a humvee. When all hell broke loose. Ambush city. The young Marines were being cut to ribbons. Mortars, machine guns, rocket propelled grenades. And the kid out of Churchville was in charge. It was do or die and it was up to him. So he moved to the side of his column, looking for a way to lead his men to safety. As he tried to poke a hole through the Iraqi line his humvee came under direct enemy machine gun fire. It was fish in a barrel and the Marines were the fish. And Brian Chontosh gave the order to attack.

He told his driver to floor the humvee directly at the machine gun emplacement that was firing at them. And he had the guy on top with the 50 cal unload on them. Within moments there were Iraqis slumped across the machine gun and Chontosh was still advancing, ordering his driver now to take the humvee directly into the Iraqi trench that was attacking his Marines. Over into the battlement the humvee went and out the door Brian Chontosh bailed, carrying an M16 and a Beretta and 228 years of Marine Corps pride. He ran along the trench, with its mortars and riflemen, machineguns and grenadiers. And he killed them all. He fought with the M16 until it was out of ammo. Then he fought with the Beretta until it was out of ammo. Then he picked up a dead man's AK4 and fought with that until it was out of ammo. Then he picked up another dead man's AK47 and fought with that until it was out of ammo.

At one point he even fired a discarded Iraqi RPG into an enemy cluster, sending attackers flying with its grenade explosion. When he was done Brian Chontosh had cleared 200 yards of entrenched Iraqis from his platoon's flank. He had killed more than 20 and wounded at least as many more. But that's probably not how he would tell it. He would probably merely say that his Marines were in trouble, and he got them out of trouble. Ooh-rah, and drive on.

"By his outstanding display of decisive leadership, unlimited courage in the face of heavy enemy fire, and utmost devotion to duty, 1st Lt. Chontosh reflected great credit upon himself and upheld the highest traditions of the Marine Corps and the United States Naval Service."

That's what the citation says. And that's what nobody will hear. That's what doesn't seem to be making the evening news. Accounts of American valor are dismissed by the press as propaganda, yet accounts of American difficulties are heralded as objectivity. It makes you wonder if the role of the media is to inform or to depress - to report or to deride. To tell the truth, or to feed us lies. But I guess it doesn't matter. We're going to turn out all right. As long as men like Brian Chontosh wear our uniform.

Just a reminder

It does matter if we don't get him because this is what he is responsible for ...

For all you illegal aliens reading my blog

Finally, I am taking up the illegal alien issue. Its illegal so its wrong. Enough said. But wait! Some people think breaking the law is a good thing. In Maryland, local politicans want to help illegals out. In one town they are spending millions to give then a center to look for work! How about a little help for those who are legally here? If we are this nice to illegals, then Canada must be even nicer. I guess I'll go to Canada and kick the Prime Minister out of his job and take it.

Here is my advice for those thinking of coming to the United States.

IF YOU REALLY WANT INTO THE UNITED STATES GET A VISA. WE GIVE THEM OUT!!! Its not that hard and cheaper (safer as well) than hiring a guy (who will probably kill you) to smuggle you across the boarder. Plus, you can legally get federal and state funds for housing and job support. Just go to the Department of State website and they'll help you out. If not, I hope you die trying to get here.

Love those Weepublicans!!!

Take that you liberal commie whores!!! Even kids know your dirty tricks.

Even Imperial Troopers need a bathroom break.

Quote of the day

"The government solution to a problem is usually as bad as the problem." -- Milton Friedman

Who needs a hero?

I need a hero. That's right, I'd just like take this opportunity to say that I'm holding out for a hero 'til the end of the night. He's got to be strong and he's got to be fast and he's got to be fresh from the fight.

For all those who are working:

Ok, so my trip to the beach got a bit out of hand

SHARK!!!

And I thought PETA was bad!

Stuffed animals of the world unite!!!

Where are they now?

Ever wondered what happened to some of the most famous sidekicks?

Should we be worried men?

Quote of the Day!

"The marvel of all history is the patience with which men and women submit to burdens unnecessarily laid upon them by their governments." -- William E. Borah

Those Tricky Dolphins!!! Just Say No Ricky!

My new parking sign. I hope it works!

What a Concerned Woman! Crashing a Marine's Funeral!

Lt. Gov. Catherine Baker Knoll of Pennsylvania recently angered a family of a marine killed in Iraqi. What did she do? Well, Knoll thought it would be nice to attend the marine's funeral, uninvited, and pass out her business cards, all the while declaring that the Pennsylvania state government was against the war in Iraq.

Not once during her time at the funeral did she speak with the marine's window, but she did think it was usefull to talk with the TV crews after the service ended. What a horrible individual!@! I don't even know where to start with this one. Knoll should know better as a publice official of a state government to not make foreign policy. Thats the federal government's job. Add to that the insensititive nature of showing up to a dead man's funeral univited and handing out business cards. You would think she wouldn't have to start campaigning until an election year and not doing so with a dead marine's family.